Child illusion is snare and delusion.

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The type #2: Child illusion is snare and delusion

This the second type of person who is living in the fantasy world.  His/her imagination is a reality. You can see complete denial and unwillingness to take responsibility in all its forms. This is an infantile people, childish, the people who look through rose-colored glasses.

As you already guess this is a Child ego-state type of person. He/she probably heard much time in their childhood something like this, ‘You are still young, stop that! You can’t do it without my help!’, ’It takes some risks, don’t do it! You are not ready for this yet!’

   Later it can grow up into a bigger picture like this:

You leaving a party and you see the group of people who is laughing out loud at something. The only one idea you will have, ‘They laughing at me’, ‘There is something wrong with me or maybe I look funny?’ The same moment subconsciously your brain plays the previous moment when you decide that you are an absolute loser. Insecurity, anxiety, fear, that’s all that you are going to feel in that moment.

   Promises have no power to a Child ego-state type of person. Cause promises come with responsibilities. The lie is giving them confidence. 

   Solution: if you are into a relationship with this type of person the best thing you can do is to help him/her gain experience. You can ask them to do something on their own by understanding responsibility through the new experience. But don’t turn it into strict instructions (at least if it’s not your employee and you are not him/her boss).  Don’t push too hard. Start with something easy. Be patient it may take some time. Don’t come up with a drama if you catch him/her in a lie.

The lie is giving them confidence. It always was. But don’t support it too. You can’t change anybody BUT you can make them want it. And when they will you’ll be there to help them.

To be continued…

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