Tag: love

Psychologically proven facts, which explains a lot…

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1. The average length of time which every woman able to keeps a secret is 47 hours 15 minutes.

2. To be alone for a too long as harmful as if you would smoke 15 cigarettes a day.

3. Bilingual people may unconsciously change their character when they are switching from one language to another.

4. People who are constantly trying to make others, at the end, are often being left alone.

5. Emotions are not affecting our style of communication. The way we say things really affecting our mood!

6. The higher human’s intelligence, the faster he thinks and the more promiscuous he is in handwriting.

7. People who have very strong sense of guilt, very well distinguishing emotions of others. They are the best detectors.

8. Men are not funnier than women, they just release more jokes, and never thinks whether other people like it or not.

9. Usually, the best pieces of advice will be given to you by those people who had lots of difficult moments and struggles in life.

10. On the first date, you can learn a lot about a person’s character, look at the way he/she treats the waiter or waitress.

11. Women are attracted to men who have a low husky voice because they seem to be very confident, but not aggressive.

12. Unsociable people always talking about themselves very little but most of the time you got the feeling that you knew them for a long time.

13. Women have two times more pain receptors than men, but also two times more pain threshold of tolerance.

14. When a person listens to music at the high frequencies, he becomes more relaxed, happy and relaxed.

15. If you have buzzing thoughts and you can’t sleep bcoz of it, write them down. Your head will become lighter and clearer.

16. SMS with the wishes of good morning and good night will activate part of the brain which is responsible for your happiness.

17. If you do things that scare you, you will become happier.

18. Friendship with someone, which we are starting in the period between 16 and 28 years, usually the most robust and long-lasting.

19. The happier we are, the less time we need to sleep.

20. When we being hurt and holding the hand of our loved one, we don’t feel so much pain and become less anxious.

21. People with the higher level of intelligence have fewer friends than the average person. The smarter we are the more selective we become.

22. There is a huge possibility that the marriage with your best friend will be more robust, and strong. That can decrease the risk of divorce by 70%.

23. Women who have most friends – men are more often being in a good mood.

24. Travel is beneficial to your mental health as well as it reduces the risk of your heart attack and depression.

25. You look much more attractive at the moment when you sharing your stories with interest and enthusiasm.

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Passionate heart and a cool mind

aa4ddfd4b5f6ea67163f0c2906d6f1f2 A passionate heart is great! No doubts, it’s always the best motivation in things you do and with people you love. If you living the life full of passion you living with the feelings that you able to move mountains. Every day is such a journey! Big passion creates big ambitions. It is killing your fear and letting you dare to meet challenges without hesitation.

But when your passion is leading you. When your emotions getting out of control, there is a big possibility to destroy your life.

Strive to balance – should become our life motto!

Look at people around you. They are living in status quo “not enough”… Not enough food, not enough money, not enough lovers, not enough fame/appreciation  e.t.c. They strive for excesses and don’t even think that they are walking a tightrope.

When your emotions are controlling your life you can’t have a sober view of things. And that means that you will probably become a hostage of your “dreams”.

It’s ok. We all have it once in a while. Our ego loves to play with us 🙂 Here are some tips that helping me to chill out and look at the situation with a different perspective. Hope you will find if helpful too 😉

  • No drama! Don’t overestimate the problem! Calm down and get yourself together. Soberly assess the situation. Follow your thoughts. See which way it goes and try to find at least more than 2 possible scenarios to your problem. Every problem has a solution! Tune in a positive way and you will feel much better. That will help you to win the time before you’ll actually do something about it. Do not panic!
  •  Create a calm space.  Try to get rid of all that the white noise around you (everything that can bother you and put you in a more frustration and stress). This may be a noisy place, emotional people around you, cell phone, tv and so on. Some people get more panic from the actual silence. If you want to think about your situation, analyze it and find a solution to it, create/find calm space for you. So nothing can bother.
  • You CAN control your emotions! Learn to control your emotions. No need to panic, screaming and fall into hysterics. Try to relax and breathe calmly. First of all take off your shoes and the belt (if you have it)! You need to stabilize your blood pressure and relax your muscles. Breathe deep and slow for a few minutes. Till you will feel that your heartbeat getting slower. Turn your focus to your right foot and focus on the way it feels. Then to the left foot. Relax your muscles and keep breathing. Slowly move up through your body. Keep breathing. In may took you 8-10 min. But you will feel better. You will be more stable and calm. You’ll succeed when you’ll try. That technique works with most of the people.

    Before you’ll share your problems with anyone (!)

    Independently think about your situation, weigh all the “pros and cons”. Think which way will help you to solve the problems as you consider in the most successful way? Don’t report to all the people around you about your current situation. Chill out and think over yourself first. And only then, if it’s necessary, share with others.

    Always listen to your inner voice! If you can’t hear it, train yourself. Spend more time with yourself. Meditate. And don’t be too hard on yourself. Sometimes all that we have to do, is just switch our attention to something else. And the solution will come.

    All the answers are withing us! It’s always better to have a passionate heart with a cool  mind. Then burning yourself from the inside 😉

Take care!

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Wide lens for your life

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When you questioning yourself about life and how things should go in your life. Take a moment and ask yourself this…

What is your life about? Do you like an old man or like a young and full passion man?

What is worse, fall or never try

If life is too short, why do you do things that you don’t like? And why you almost don’t have time for something/someone you really love?

If you are allowed to change only one thing in the world, what would it be?

If happiness will be the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

Do you do things for what you believe, or trying to believe in what you are doing?

If the average human life lasted 40 years, what would you change in your life, so you live it in the most exciting way?

What makes you worry the most: to make things right or do the right thing?

If you will have lunch with three people you respect and appreciate. And they will start to criticize your close friend, not knowing that you are friends with him. You know that this criticism is unfair and humiliating. What will you do?

If you could give to a kid only one piece of advice, what would you say?

Would you break the law in order to save a loved one?

What in this life do you differently than other people don’t? How do you different from others?

How is it that, that something that makes you happy, doesn’t make happy other people?

What do you really want to do, but never tried before? What is stopping you from that?

Why do you hold something for so long, when you know that it’s time to let go?

If you will have to move to another country, where would you move and why?

Why do you do it? Is it really what you want? Is that you?

What are you most thankful for?

What would you do if your greatest fear became real?

Do you remember how you were terribly upset 5 years ago? Does it matter now?

What is your happiest memory of childhood? What makes it so?

If not now, then when?

If you haven’t achieved something yet, what is missing in your action plan?

Why are the people who preach love, are causing so many aggression and violence?

Is it possible to be clear and straight about what is good and what is bad?

If you will get a million dollars now, would you quit your job?

Do you have the feeling that today is the day that you lived before? Dejavu?

When was the last time you started to be active about something and take actions on it?

If everyone you know will die tomorrow, who you will visit first?

Would you like to exchange the 10 years of your life to worldwide fame and awesome physical appearance?

What is the difference between  life and existence?

When it comes time to observe the risks and take actions why do you stop?

If we learn from our mistakes, why are we afraid to make them?

What would you do differently, if you will know that no one will blame and judge you for that?

When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? Your heartbeat?

What do you love? What do you do to express your love?

For each day of the past 5 years, will you be able to remember what did you do yesterday? The day before yesterday?

The decisions are taken here and now. Do you take it yourself or someone takes them for you?

How to get rid of negative thoughts?

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How often do you fall into negative thoughts for a day? Just think about it? We are more willing to talk about things that we don’t like, rather than things we like! Wich means, we would prefer to criticize everything that goes around us and spends our pressure lifetime on that, rather that just be happy! That’s crazy!

I am guilty too, to be honest… a few days ago I’ve been insane to see how easily people I love giving up on their dreams and prefer nothing but to go with a flow! And they call it “the God’s will”… Well, I DO LOVE GOD! Nothing against it, but your journey into the wild is really on your own! God is just a guide. Doesn’t mean he will do the job for you! You have to do it yourself via experience, mistakes, lessons, pain, and so on. But that’s just me and my own point of view.

Anyway, if you falling into the same problem of having negative thoughts or being judgemental and critics, here are 4 simple methods to ger rid of it!

Cut it off!

As soon as you feel that your start falling into negative thoughts, simply cut it off. Don’t spend the time to analyze it or beat it! Don’t try to hide or protect yourself from it, simply replace it with something else. And the key principle here is you should do that immediately. At the very first moment, as soon as you felt negativity!

The issues in quotes.

This method is different from the first one. Here we distance ourselves from the negativity and watch it from the side. We need to switch our attention and perception of the information from the inside world to the outside. Don’t let the situation master you. Sometimes you may think, “What’s happening to me?” – Today I had such a thought… Put your buzzing thoughts in quotes and simply watch it from the side.
Negative thoughts have power over you if only you respond to them.

Exaggerate it!

Once you’ll find yourself in a negative place, you have to exaggerate it to the absurd. And the key point is to make it funny! You have to catch yourself on negative thoughts because your consciousness is the great deceiver. Every day your brain is trying to play with you some kind of a joke. Have you noticed it? Allow urself to make fun of your problems and create an absurd in your head. That will help you to deprive the negative thought influence. Because negative thoughts have power over you only if you respond to them.

Opposition.

All that the negative thought has said to us, we have to turn it to the exact opposite. Once you got the idea, “I won’t be able to make a sale,” you have to replace it with the opposite thought. Like so, “I certainly will be able to make a sale”. If you thought comes, “I will never be able to achieve financial success in life”, you should immediately replace it with such a statement as, “I’m sure I will achieve huge financial success in life.” As soon as the thought came: “I am such a looser. Everything I do is such a failure. I can’t do anything!” – you need to say to yourself, “I can do anything! I am unique and a very unusual man.”

I know, it is absolutely impossible to think about the negative and positive things at the same time. Because your consciousness can think of one thing at the time only. But when you’ll dispose the negative thoughts and replace it with the positive one, negative thought won’t have an influence over you.

Be creative with these methods and choose the one that will work for you the most! Do not let negativity rule your life!

 

 

 

 

People you are too comfortable with…

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Hi, guys!

Before the weekends I want you to give some food for thoughts. This blog will be simple but very analytical (if only I can use this word) for your character and life.

Most of you probably heard about Boiling Frog Syndrome.

Scientists put a frog into a pot with water. And they started to rising temperature very slow. Just because the frog is cold-blooded animal his body felt comfortable in the pot with room temperature water. The frog adjusted to the slowly rising temperature without a problem or feeling the danger. 
But when scientists tried to bring the frog to the pot with boiling water, a green little guy tried to escape. His body reacted immediately. 
Why am I bringing you this story? Yesterday my friend and I talked about pros and cons in a friendship between man and female while someone in serious relationships/marriage. He told me that it’s totally fine to have a “friends” (girls). His girlfriend understands that and it doesn’t damage his relationship with her.
So I asked him, “I do understand the fact that sort of friendship exists, but it’s great when you meet each other in the company. And not tet-a-tet. How come she support you with that if you’re back home in the middle of the night after “meeting with a friend?”
And he said to me, “Well I don’t do anything bad. I am just talking. I like to spend time with my “friend” (girl). She is very fun and interesting to talk with. And I am not a cheater. Even when I want to cheat, I never do that. My girlfriend trusts me.”
And asked, “What do you think now?” He kept silent.
That’s the thing! When something happening up front, we just like that frog feeling the danger and trying to escape. But when we are too comfortable someone can get us on a hook! And who knows what kind of outcome you’ll get at the end?
Back to our story about the green little guy… The outcome is boiling delicious frog soup! 😉 Unfortunately, when this little guy understood that he is in danger, it was too late…. 🙂
I am not telling you that you should cut off all the friends out of your soulmate, not at all. I am just telling you to be aware of people with who he/she is too comfortable with. You can trust to your partner, for sure. But you’ll never trust to the other person. Everybody is different and not everybody is angels.
Take care!
 

How to take criticism?

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When someone is bashing you is quite difficult to stay still and ask for clarification. But we have to admit that every criticism has some healthy grain.  We have to accept some parts of us even if it’s hard to handle. Criticism is always associated in some disappointments about us. It’s important to recognize the fact that we ain’t that perfect! And we have some room to work with.

Here are some tips that can help you to get benefits from criticism:

  • Master your emotions. You need to become the master of your face. It’s very important to keep your first emotion when someone is giving you the hard time. Most of us will feel strong anger and disagreement but if not react immediately our emotions will cool down. So we will have time to think on the right line and won’t be a regret of thrown words.
  • Look from the perspective of the other side. Maybe he/she see something you don’t? Maybe there is the lack of understanding? Maybe the difference of expectations from each other? Before you start putting your line out loud think from the perspective of the other side.
  • Don’t take it so personally!
  • Think about the opportunity to improve yourself! Most of the time criticism is directed on the results of your work or activities. Even if you did something great, the moment of criticism will show you that there was a lack of understanding. Next time be more specific, ask a lot of questions and make sure that you know exactly what they want. Don’t be afraid to ask one more time. It’s OK.  And the outcome is what is real matters.
  • Take responsibility for your actions. If you did something wrong face it! No need to spend time on excuses and finding the real Mr. Guilty. If you are involved in something you are responsible for it! Make a lesson and think how you can improve yourself.                                                                                                                                                          “Never argue. In society nothing must be discussed; give only results.”

                                                                                                          – Benjamin Disraeli

  • Stay cool. We are all people and we are all having bad days. Take it with a little bit of understanding. If you see that complaints are a total fabrication, probably it’s just a bad day for that person! Stay cool and keep your ego off.
  • Tomorrow will be a new day. Make sure you are not doing the same mistake twice. Your experience is precious, so don’t ignore it!
  • Learn to appreciate criticism! It’s an experience and experience as we are all known is precious! Learn from until it’s FREE!

The material has been written for this course.

One bite and all your dreams will come true!

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Old Hag: And because you’ve been so good to poor old granny, I’ll share a secret with you. This is no ordinary apple. It’s a magic wishing apple.
Snow White: A wishing apple?
Old Hag: Yes!
Snow White: Really?
Witch: Yes, girlie. Now, make a wish and take a bite.

Snow white and the seven dwarfs (1937)

I am sure you’ve met some people who always trying to pull you back. They usually annoying, repulsive and always demanding something from you. Take a closer look at them, maybe it’s not just a nasty personalities? Maybe they are poisoning your life? Maybe you surrounded by wolfs in a cheep’s clothing?

It can be your lifetime friend who complains a lot how little you spend time together because you are always busy. Or some relative who loves you SO MUCH that seeing you engaged with a serious relationship will try his/her best to show you THE REAL SIDE of your partner. Or maybe your ex who still has an influence on you still trying to manipulate you or your finances? Sometimes it can be not too obvious and you will just meet people who irritating you and leaving you with nothing but a headache, tiredness, and sadness.

And when you recognize such people around you, you need to decide will you keep distance with them but still let them be in your life? Or you will just cut them off?

Here are some signs of people who are poisoning your life:

  1.  They try to control you. It’s funny to say, but people who can’t take control over their life and manage it will try to manage your life. And will tell you what to do and how to do? And whether indeed you have to do it at all? Don’t expect them to be too obvious with that. For some people, maybe. But for most, it will be super creative manipulations connected to the feeling of guiltiness. And your inability to love somebody and appreciate friendship for real.
  2. They are always right! They know what is better for you. They know the real reason why the earth moves and why glaciers are melting. Any other’s opinion a just waste of time. They know better. Period! These type of people extremely painful will admit that they are mistaken about something. And if they will, they will nurse a grievance against you. And they will wait until the moment you’ll made a mistake. To put you back in place.
  3. They like to be a victim. They won’t spend time on finding an opportunity to improve their life. But they will be happy to spend hours to tell you that the entire world against them. And no one understands them. Even you, because you are busy with your job and your life. They will never try to be better, instead, they would prefer that everybody will fall until their level of unhappiness. They like to make excuses to everything, to give a “reasonable” explanations or deny their guilt for whatever happened.
  4. They always take but never gives you anything back. A healthy relationship, whatever it is, is like a ping pong game. The ball should hit the racquet of your partner and come back to you. But these type of people will take from you everything that they can and as long as you have enough.
  5. They don’t respect your boundaries. How many times did you tell them not to do this or that because it hurts your feelings? And they still do? And it’s always excuses…
  6. They love to hear your crying.  More often they will ask how are you doing and if you give them even a little hint, that something is not ok. They will focus on that and will talk about it on and on and on until they see you crying. I had a friend who once told me, “Tell me about your problems. When I hear about yours, mine’s become nothing.” I mean, that what the “real” friends do. Right? 🙂
  7. They don’t want you to be successful and strong. Of course, they will tell that they do. But every time you fail they’ll be happy. How dare you have better life/dream/car/boyfriend/girlfriend/house/job than they are? When you are achieving your goals and they see how brave and how strong you are they will compare. And they will see how they weak and pitiful. Do you think they are gonna like that? Do you think they will forgive you for that? They will do with their “support” everything to see you crushed, crying and full of regrets. And they will be there, to save you.

These are just some signs to see how people are poisoning your life. Of course, it can be countless numbers. But these are the easiest to recognize.

Take care and be curious about people around you.